When should I hire a Divorce Lawyer?

Sometimes married couples who plan on getting divorced think it’s a good idea to settle-up with a spouse and then retain a lawyer to draw up the necessary paperwork. 

Clearly, it’s preferable to be reasonable and proceed in good faith in dealing with your spouse, particularly in instances where the marriage has fallen apart but the respective parties still care for one another.     

Marriage offers an economy of scale that extends beyond just tax rates, deductions, and claiming eligible dependents.  

Legal Separation and dividing a household often involve substantially increased living expenses.    

Establishing and maintaining two separate households on the same income, especially when children are involved, can result in expenses that are in fact more than doubled.   

It’s therefore understandable some might think they’re saving money by “working things out” in advance without the participation of legal counsel.  

We understand short-term cash flow may be an issue. 

At the same time, you worked hard for your house, retirement, 401K, and other personal and marital assets. 

You should protect them.    

Getting divorced is a major life event. 

While an attorney is not required to prepare a Separation Agreement or to even file for divorce in North Carolina, once certain documents are executed and/or filed, some mistakes cannot be fixed – Bill Powers

If you don’t know what QDRO stands for (qualified domestic relations order) or what happens if you fail to timely allege a claim for Equitable Distribution, we urge you to consult with an experienced divorce lawyer in Charlotte.

I did some research on Google 

The Internet can be a helpful source of information, at least during the formative stages of a divorce.   

If nothing else, on-line research can get you up-to-speed on some of the important terms and general precepts of getting divorced in North Carolina.   

Unfortunately, there is a tremendous amount of either misleading or incorrect “free advice” out there.   

It is our considered opinion that self-help forums and purportedly “simple online divorce forms” involving post-separation support, child custody agreements, alimony, and Equitable Distribution are problematic at best. 

Indeed, executing (signing) some agreements without the advice of a lawyer can have long term, negative, and irrevocable consequences.   

It’s imperative to have a thorough understanding of your assets and the true value of the “marital estate.” 

That often necessitates a review of bank records, real property valuation(s), mortgages, taxes, and the NC Child Support Guidelines before negotiating or agreeing to terms of separation. 

Marriage by its very nature involves a comingling of assets.

Separating and distributing assets, hopefully without harming or reducing their value or incurring substantial financial penalties, can be a challenging if not vexing process.

We believe good decisions are predicated on having accurate, complete information. 

That applies to both financial records and protecting your individual legal rights.  

Some people tell their spouse, “I want a divorce,” not fully understanding the full range of consequences and how truly complicated determining child visitation, support, and distribution of assets can be.   

“The financial aspects of ending a marriage are a common source of conflict and can be as troublesome as settling any hotly contested dispute in court  – Bill Powers, Mecklenburg Divorce Lawyer 

Before doing anything, perhaps even before telling your spouse you want a divorce, we think it’s important to fully understand your legal rights relative to your particular marriage.    

You and your marriage are unique

Contrary to what some might think, one size does not fit all. 

That is especially true regarding divorce in North Carolina.   

Marital circumstances are rarely exactly the same from one marital relationship to another.

If that weren’t the case, it wouldn’t matter who you married.

What is important to you, how you raise your family, your faith, spending habits, and where you live might not mean a hill of beans to anyone else besides you.

That might even be true for your spouse.

There are reasons people get divorced.

As such, the advice of friends and family, as well-meaning as it may be, is all too often inapplicable to your individual matter, your financial condition, your personal concerns, needs, and circumstances.  

It also may be flat out wrong and directly contrary to the divorce laws in North Carolina.

Even close friends and family often do not fully share the intricacies, difficulties, and nuances of their marriages.

Suffice it to say, some things better go unsaid. 

Experience shows, those “embarrassing” and “unsaid” issues can be the reason for the divorce in the first place and possibly a point of contention in the future.    

Friends and family also may feel it more important to support you and your feelings, rather than be brutally honest regarding certain issues and human frailties.  

They also may not have all the facts or a full understanding of what the law is, rather than what they think it is or should be.   

One of the benefits of the attorney-client privilege allows for complete disclosure of all the facts and circumstances of a divorce.   

“You should tell your divorce lawyer the whole truth, even if it might be a bit embarrassing.  Our job is to provide sound legal advice, not to judge you” – Bill Powers  

Legal Reference Materials:  Separation, Support, Custody, and Divorce

1. What does Absolute Divorce mean? 
2. What does Joint Custody mean? 
3. What am I entitled to in a Divorce? 
4. How long does it take to get Divorced in North Carolina? 
5. Child Custody and Visitation During the Coronavirus
6. NC Divorce Laws